|
Post by Aura of Cruxis on May 18, 2011 23:12:51 GMT -5
Am I the ONLY one who hasn't had a girlfriend or boyfriend even as a graduating senior in high school? Am I the only one that feels like it's more of another responsibility that culture has placed upon teenagers who don't want to have lovers?
When I tell people I haven't had a lover, they're so surprised, and I really don't know why. I don't feel attractions to girls or to boys, so why should I find a lover? This counts even for adults (who'd I'd expect to tell me, "Good! Now stay that way until you're 35.")
I don't think I'm unattractive, but I'm not stunningly sexy either; girls have asked me out, so it's not like I "haven't had a chance to experience." (I just reject them all, haha.) I don't think I should be obligated to go out with someone in whom I have no interest.
I dunno, I just have my father, aunts, great-uncles, and underclassmen pestering me to find a girl. I feel like I need to rant.
|
|
|
Post by Gran Gran on May 19, 2011 1:12:58 GMT -5
rant away.
These things can't be rushed. Heck, while I had a pretty serious relationship when I was 16, after that went away I didn't have a steady date until my mid 20s. There is absolutely nothing wrong with not dating and having relationships. When the right person comes around, you'll know it. I do agree, jumping into things with people you don't really feel anything for in terms of 'love' or liking is the wrong way to go about these things.
(but that tingly feeling in your stomach when you do meet that person is priceless!! ^_^)
|
|
|
Post by Musogato on May 19, 2011 2:32:15 GMT -5
I agree with Gran. Our lives don't all follow the same track; what is normal for some is not for others, and vice versa. And things tend to get worse/more uncomfortable when you try to mold yourself into what other people expect when it's not right for you. Honestly, it's your life -- play it by your own standards. Things will happen when they will, and it's really no one else's business if or when you decide to take those steps.
(And no, you're not the only one; there's a number of people who feel similar. Although as the overwhelming culture shows, it's a bit of a minority. But that doesn't make it any less valid.)
|
|
|
Post by goten0040 on May 19, 2011 15:19:14 GMT -5
I have had one boyfriend in my lifetime, and we were not quite as close as we should have been to be dating. He was my boyfriend from Sophomore year in high school to right before my Senior year. I haven't had one since and I'm going into my fourth year of college. But don't worry so much about it. I've come to realize (after a lot of time moping) that the person that I'm meant to be with may not be in the same place that I am right now - physically, mentally, emotionally - everything. You just have to focus on other things - things you love to do. With that will come people who would love to do those things too. And that may be where you find your significant other. You never know. Focus on you. It's not a bad thing.
|
|
|
Post by Aura of Cruxis on May 19, 2011 21:16:05 GMT -5
Thanks for the response. ^_^
I know there are people out there like me, but I guess I just need reassurance. =P I dunno why; it's weird.
I get kinda lonely, but then I get more lonely trying to spend time with friends; most of them take their girlfriends//boyfriends/dates along to places (without asking me), and then I just feel like the awkward-third/fifth-wheel-and-driver (since I'm really the one they ask to drive around since I live a town away and I have to drive anyways.) Towards the end of the day, I find myself just standing off to the side waiting for them all by myself feeling even lonelier than before, lol. I kinda wish teenage culture didn't revolve so much around relationship as much as it does. ._.
|
|
|
Post by goten0040 on May 19, 2011 21:36:45 GMT -5
Yeah, it's lame. You should bring it up to your friends that you want to spend one-on-one time with them once in awhile. You'll find as time goes on it's not really such a big deal. Just continue being who you are and enjoying life. (Plus, you'll come to find as you get older how NICE alone time can be. Haha!)
|
|
|
Post by Gran Gran on May 20, 2011 11:32:38 GMT -5
Yeah, it's lame. You should bring it up to your friends that you want to spend one-on-one time with them once in awhile. You'll find as time goes on it's not really such a big deal. Just continue being who you are and enjoying life. (Plus, you'll come to find as you get older how NICE alone time can be. Haha!) Oh, yeah, alone time! ^_^ I will have a weekend of mostly that! (probably forgot what to do by myself.....) But I do have to agree, being the one single person among couples sucks. luckily when I was that age, my friends were mostly unattached guys and the 2 girls with BF, who were in turn good guys. One of the worst times I ever had was when i went out with a girl and her BF....yech.... Don't let them sucker you into being the designated driver all the time (or make them give you gas money at least!) And try for some 'guys night out' deal...though at this stage in life, there is this strange symbiotic thing going on in couples...can't bear it to be a second away from the other....(needless to say I did never get that one either) But there is light at the end of the tunnel: The teenage years don't last forever!
|
|
|
Post by Aura of Cruxis on May 20, 2011 20:53:11 GMT -5
LOL I think the whole inability to be detached from one another for fear of losing ability to exist is the problem here, as you said, Gran. Meh, I'll get over it, lol. The underclassmen are cool bunch to hang out with, so I stick around them. They're much cooler than I am, but they don't seem to mind letting a senior stick around, I guess, hahaha.
|
|
|
Post by Gran Gran on May 21, 2011 14:20:12 GMT -5
LOL I think the whole inability to be detached from one another for fear of losing ability to exist is the problem here, as you said, Gran. Meh, I'll get over it, lol. The underclassmen are cool bunch to hang out with, so I stick around them. They're much cooler than I am, but they don't seem to mind letting a senior stick around, I guess, hahaha. Pft, you are a DH kid, you are cool!
|
|
|
Post by goten0040 on May 21, 2011 23:12:25 GMT -5
Yeah, and that all changes outside high school. Trust me, most of those couples will hit college and separate like roaches with the lights on.
|
|
|
Post by MasterPakku93 on May 21, 2011 23:36:19 GMT -5
I don't view relationships the same way that most high school students seem to. Most people are just out there to say "I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND THAT MEANS I WIN RIGHT?" But I am waiting to find someone I actually care for. That's what's important. Sex is the only thing in the minds of high school students, and I try to stay out of that mindset and remind myself that there are much more important things than that.
|
|
|
Post by Aura of Cruxis on May 24, 2011 17:20:38 GMT -5
Okay, okay, okay...
So I'm having a predicament. I finally sound someone I was attracted to on TV...but he looks/probably is liek 13. I feel liek a pedo...
|
|
|
Post by Gran Gran on May 24, 2011 19:08:46 GMT -5
Okay, okay, okay... So I'm having a predicament. I finally sound someone I was attracted to on TV...but he looks/probably is liek 13. I feel liek a pedo... LOOL, on TV? oh well, we'll overlook it for now.
|
|
|
Post by Aura of Cruxis on May 26, 2011 0:28:25 GMT -5
Well, like, no. Seriously. That's creepy, right?
|
|
|
Post by Gran Gran on May 26, 2011 8:46:35 GMT -5
LOL, I don't know who you are talking about (a 13 yo Myley Cyrus, now that would be creepy)
But considering they all look older, no, wait, they usually look younger....
Nah, I don't think it's creepy...(unless it goes past this one person and much deeper than liking)
;D
|
|