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Post by avatarasabat on Dec 22, 2007 11:23:36 GMT -5
OK 'spect a PM soon Manzai :3
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Post by liz6363 on Jan 6, 2008 20:30:28 GMT -5
I'm pretty sure 99% of OC's are Marysues/Gary Stu's considering if they weren't anything special then why would you put them into a story?
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Post by highelemental on Jan 6, 2008 20:47:32 GMT -5
I'm pretty sure 99% of OC's are Marysues/Gary Stu's considering if they weren't anything special then why would you put them into a story? Sort of, most characters have some Sue traits, but it's all about execution and context. Several Avatar characters, like Aang, Katara, and Toph have Sue-ish traits but they have attributes that even things out, like Aang's shirking of responsibility, Katara's vengeful streak, and Toph's brashness for starters. The only Avatar character that I believe is dangerously close to Sue territory is Azula, who really doesn't have any real detrimental qualities.
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Post by avatarasabat on Jan 6, 2008 21:10:09 GMT -5
Someone doesn't know what a Sue is ..
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manzai
Toph
Everybody have fun tonight! Everybody Wang Fire tonight!
Posts: 152
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Post by manzai on Jan 7, 2008 11:49:38 GMT -5
Sort of, most characters have some Sue traits, but it's all about execution and context. That's true. There a lot of debate around here about Katara being a Sue, and a while ago people were saying Yue was a sue, and those are partially true statements. Good writers can have characters with some sue traits but keep them from being annoying to the audience.
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Post by Alouncara on Jan 12, 2008 9:35:34 GMT -5
If they were normal and boring about people like us who would read them? HJave I eveer written something about me that is true and everydayish other than in a diary? No... No one would or care...
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Post by appayipyip500 on Jan 12, 2008 17:33:03 GMT -5
Here is a character I just thought of and haven't quite finished developing her yet, but I wanted to get some input just the same.
Name: Areya (name is a work in progress, first thing that came to mind) Nation: Northern Water Tribe Bender: Yes, trained as a healer Eyes: Blue Hair: Brown Clothing: Traditional water tribe Height/Weight: Average height, slender Age: Just turned 16 (marrying age) Weapon: none Skill Level: An adept healer; during the story she learns and excels at waterbending as well
Personality:Areya is very headstrong and independent, she is often rebelling against her father in one thing or another. Sometimes I think she only does something because she knows her father doesn't want her to. (Some may say that this goes against the typical water tribe personality, which is caring, peaceful, mother-like, (like Katara) but I think that in every race there must be SOME distinction, so Areya's personality could work) She is extremely loyal to her nation, and desperately wants to fight to protect it. Because of her independent nature she often does not listen to the advice of others, which ultimately leads to some terrible consequences. Deep down she loves her father, but she still rebells against his constricting views on her life.
Family: Father, Mother, Older Brother
History: Grew up in an average water tribe family, trained as a healer from an early age. The story takes place after the siege of the north, so the new waterbending master has begun training girls who show exceptional talent in waterbending. Areya desperately wants to be trained as a waterbender, but her father tells her her duty is to marry and raise a family. She defies him and becomes a fighter for the Northern water tribe. I wont give away the entire plot, but I can say it will contain a lot of action, drama, and tragedy. Im working on a way to add a little romance, but havent thought of how yet.
Connections to cannon: Just that she was there when the gAang came to the north pole.
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Post by avatarasabat on Jan 13, 2008 17:46:53 GMT -5
If they were normal and boring about people like us who would read them? HJave I eveer written something about me that is true and everydayish other than in a diary? No... No one would or care... Wow someone is mad that her fic wasn't overpraised. I prefer a character that I can relate to, than someone over powered and pseudo-disabled like Toph.
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Post by inspiredpandora on Feb 1, 2008 13:51:35 GMT -5
Alright, I know I'm a newb here, but...yeah...
I don't plan on writing any fanfiction but I do enjoy creating diffrent characters and working on character developing skills. Critizism is encoraged and any tips I can use to help improve my writing will be appreciated.
Here's one little chracter I was day dreaming about.
Name: Haven't really come up with one as of now... but I was thinking of something simple Gender: female Height: probably around 5 ft Age: I was thinking in the early teens Nation: Air Occupation: Bison Hearder (some one's gotta keep thoes animals tended to, right?) Apperence: As she is a Bison header, her clothes would be worn for comfort and protection against the elemets. Tough and sloppy cloth that would not compliment her figuer. She would nearly always smell bad and dirty. She'd either have a shaved head or very shaggy short hair. I plan this character to be very independent as she is always either hearding the bison or cleaning up after them. She wouldn't be very sociable and would naturally like being alone. So I think she'd have a very independent style to her. History: I'm thinking along the lines that she would have completed some very simple air bender training, as we don't no much about the air benders, let alone the females, I'm not very sure on how she would come to be a shephard.
I'm willing to change anything about this chracter and I'm very open to name suggestions. Any thoughts would be welcome!
-Pandora
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Post by metalwork on Feb 14, 2008 4:33:43 GMT -5
Being me and new to the forums, I think it's weird that I don't know hardly what this topic is about, but I read a lot on it and came up with an estimation.
Are we seeing if our OC's are cliche or not? Lol.
Anyway, I'm not one to criticize, but inspiredpandora should go into more detail on her character. It's good so far, yet I want to see more out of it! I can't really grasp her personality, and where she really came from.
Lawlipops. I will put mine up next, after we're finished discussing this one.
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Post by writer on Mar 1, 2008 11:33:36 GMT -5
I agree so far so good. but she's flat.
As for bision herder, is she caravaner or temple dweller?
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Post by Zukosfire5 on Mar 1, 2008 12:15:30 GMT -5
Also, you should go into detail on her history too. and you should specifically describe her appearance (what do her clothes look like, hair color, skin color, eye color, etc.)
Looks good though!
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Post by godhunter on Mar 31, 2008 12:18:58 GMT -5
Alright, I'm not an RP mod, but I've been RPing for a good long while now, and I can tell you that if I was checking characters I would see that last paragraph as you being very lazy. The character "looks to be mid 20's". First off that isn't an age, she needs an actual age just like every other avatar, but beyond that if someone is 20 their base personality would have been formed long ago. For the most part the basic personality of every single human being is formed before they are three or four. That doesn't mean it can't change, but changes after that point are more minor than anything.
She needs a name if you want her to be seriously look at. In the female category when you say you don't want her to overtly female, do mean in personality or in looks? Either way that is not part of her gender, so just leave it as female and explain the less than female aspects of her in her personality area.
For the bender category I get that she will be the first avatar eventually, but to say eventually all of them is a given, so in stead tell us what she already knows. Also keep in mind that by the age of twenty she will be learning her second bending practice and by late twenties she might even have mastered three of the four.
I think I know what you are going for in the nation category, but you'll have to explain why there is no nation for her to be in in your history.
Hieght/Wieght, the hieght is fine, but average wieght doesn't tell us much.
The flaws category you just need to remember that you don't refer to other characters as characters, you refer to them as people. Also there is more to a personality than flaws, try renaming it Personality and fleshing it out more...alot more.
I'm going to be perfectly honest with you, your history is killing me. By 20something she will have had her own personal history already, and to say she came from somewhere unspecifically doesn't really sit well with me.
Connection to Canon: She is the first avatar, thats a pretty big connection.
I understand that you want the avatar to be molded by the people, and thats great and all, but its not realisitic. There is no way that her personality can be molded by four different groups of people, as I said earlier a basic personality is formed in the first few years of life, its only very subtle changes that happen in the later life, and since she will have been raised or around certain people those certain people will have the most influence on her.
You said this was an ambitious character and I agree, its very ambitious. That means however that if you want people to look at it seriously you can't be vague, it has to be in depth. There is alot to keep in mind when creating the first avatar, because we don't know what life was like way back at the begining of the world. In fact all that we are told is that Tui and La became mortal near the begining, and that Koh is one of the only spirits old enough to remember that. That is a lot of blank space that you have to fill in. Are there even four seperate nations at this point, or is it just one or two small groups of people? Does the spirit world play a more direct role in daily life since it is just beginging. Where did these people even come from? Where the first people originall spirits such as Tui and La that crossed over to the mortal realm? Also know that what the first avatar does is going to set presidence for tradition for the rest of the cycle. Maybe for instance the first avatar learns that she can bend mulitple elements at age 16, and so that is why they tell the avatar who they are when they turn 16.
I think that this could be a very interesting character, but it really has to be a long bio, because I can't see a complete image of the person and culture forming from a short one....
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silentxorchestra
Aang
Shoot for the moon, even if you miss you'll land among the stars.
Posts: 54
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Post by silentxorchestra on Jun 3, 2008 20:48:35 GMT -5
Ooh this is a fun thread! *hops aboard*
Some critizism would be greatly appreciated, the last post was two months ago, so I hope there are still some peeps lurking around here!
Name: Xiu, Gender: Female Nation: Fire Bender: No Father: Wu-Yong, Low ranking fire nation solider. Mother: Jia, Housewife but does odd cleaning jobs around the village to earn some extra money. Brothers: Katsuo 19, At the moment he still lives at home to protect the family, he is a little arrogant about being a fire bender (even though he's not a very good one) Ken 17, A skilled swordsman (though he wishes he were a firebender like his brother) Sister: Lu-Si-Yan 6, Very sweet, She is the one family member who is closest to Xiu (more on this further on) Eyes: Brown, quite small and slanted. Hair: Black and very straight. It reaches her shoulder blades and she has a think fringe (bangs) that frame her face Home town: A small Fire Nation village Age: 16 Clothing: Red and white kimono, as they are a large family and quite poor, Xiu has to make do with patchy old cast offs for clothing. She tried to dress up her kimono by sewing in patterns of her own design. Height/Weight: 5'4, Xiu is a little overweight , she doesn't eat excessively, she just has a naturally round, plump figure. Fighting skills: None what-so-ever. Xiu has for a long time lived in the shadow of her older brothers talents and achievements, especially Katsuo, the fire bender. She has come to accept that unlike her brothers, she will never be a great fighter. Instead Xiu has learned to use her mind and book smarts to get by. Flaws: She sometimes can't suppress her jealousy of how mush more attention her brothers have received. Though, she never dares voice these thoughts. As a middle child Xiu is very quiet and quite uncomfortable in being in the spotlight. She is shy, sensitive and not very confident in herself. Xiu can also be overly protective and a bit nagging and motherly towards her sister Lu-Si-Yan. Interests: Xiu's strongest quality is her knowledge, she is an utter bookworm who could go for hours at a time lost in a book. As her family can't afford books she will wake up early in the morning, just to use the library. Her mother isn't very impressed with this. She thinks with a war going on Xiu is wasting her time reading useless stories when she should be helping out at home. Xiu is sometimes worried that with her father being away for such long periods of time at war that Lu-Si-Yan will forget about him, so she tells her sister stories about their father and sometimes even writes them down for her, with illustrations. Xiu is very resourceful that way. Connections to Canon: None.
I am very open to constructive critisism and suggestions, thank you!
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Tera253
Gran Gran
In Soviet Russia, post writes you
Posts: 588
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Post by Tera253 on Jun 7, 2008 2:17:56 GMT -5
here's mine... Name: Sanaki Altina Li Chan Gender: Female Height: 4'7" Weight: 74 Bending: Fire Nation: Fire (obviously) Image: Click HereOther traits: she is blind, but "sees" with firebending. she uses the heat levels of her surroundings to "see". in colder conditions or during an eclipse, she is completely blind. she uses her hands to feel the air to enhance her "vision", and she goes barefoot so she can better pick up heat readings from the ground. Skills: Sanaki is about as skilled as Azula, except she is faster, but is not as powerful. Weaknesses: she's weak against cold tempereatures, and her small, thin body is unable to take very many hits before she'll drop. She has a tendency to pick fights with people, and this sometimes gets her in trouble. Personality: rude and sarcastic to people she doesn't like, loving and friendly to those who like her in return. she is also very forgiving. Background: Sanaki was found at a young age by a mysterious woman named Kai, who was a wandering waterbender. she raised Sanaki as her own child, and taught her the movements to firebending. since Sanaki was blind, she was able to fice drectly at the sun, and she taught herself her moves. Since her style is unorthodox, it is faster, with more defensive maneuvers than what might be considered normal. this is to protect her small, weak body. so yeah, that's a very basic summary of my character, Sanaki Li Chan. you'll hear a lot about her from me in fanfics and such, so tell me what you think of her. ~Sanaki~
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