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Post by spiritmage234 on Jul 8, 2007 23:51:42 GMT -5
femaleairbender: Yes. It's true that you shouldn't go around buggin and beggin people to read your fanfic. I remember one user who would ask me to read his fanfic at every single possible moment. In fact, everytime I was in a totally unrelated board, say, critical thinking, he would ask me if I had read his fanfic (very n00bish indeed ). I eventually read it (after he asked about 40 times) and in the end his fanfic was....Meh. Although, I do admit that I did avertise my first fanfic to some people on the forum, but only cuz 1)It was my very first fanfic and I knew that if I didn't advertise it no one would bother reading it (since the creations board isn't the most active board on the forum and I lot of people didn't know about the series I based it on), 2)I only asked my friends who were the fans of the series to read it since there aren't many of us on the forum and I wanted them to enjoy it. Plus, I was really proud of my first fanfic and I definately didn't write it for the attention (if you were a fan of the series, you'd know what I mean). So I got my reviews, and they were wonderful cuz all of the readers enjoyed it, and to be honest, they got me motivated to write even more. =) So, there is a difference in writing a fanfic to just get the attention and beggin people to read it and writing a fanfic so then others will enjoy it and simply askin them what they think. You definately shouldn't do the first one. Wilderness Writer: I normally just put my author notes at the beginning before I present my work. I usually just write how and why I got motivated to write the piece. @ Gandalan: Yus I do write poetry. Anything you wanna ask about it? =))
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pirateliz
Avatar Aang
Co-creator of A Far Cry From Home.
Posts: 1,153
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Post by pirateliz on Jul 9, 2007 0:45:46 GMT -5
I would love to put up parts of my work, but unfortantly I don't have any of it transferred to my laptop yet. The only thing I have here is a fanfiction I started for my character Matsu (the man in my signature) and it totally needs an overhaul.
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Post by spiritmage234 on Jul 9, 2007 13:49:48 GMT -5
pirateliz: Well, whenever you're ready. ^_^ Well, heres the official summary to my latest story, Kalare of Night. Ermmm, I dunno if I want the title to stay that way, but w/e for now. ^_^' For seven years, the countries of Dauphin and Orillia warred with each other for dominance over the other. With the rival country of Orillia edging near victory in the war, the Dauphin government called for an assembly of an elite team of soldiers to bring the Orillian army to its knees. The Black Cats, an all female team of assassins, was created, and helped bring an end to Orillia’s campaign. Since the end of the war, Dauphin became a power hungry dictatorship, thirsty to conquer smaller countries. In order to successfully bring down rival countries, the government called for the experimentation on veteran soldiers in order to make unstoppable killing machines for the upcoming campaigns. Kalare, the second in command of the Black Cats, escapes from the lab that imprisoned her for a year, and is branded a traitor and a fugitive. Now a member of XSol, a resistance group to bring an end to Dauphin’s dictatorship, Kalare uses her sword, Little Brother, to fight the government. But she has a secret that the government wants her dead for…
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Post by neodee on Jul 9, 2007 15:55:19 GMT -5
^Sounds kick A** to me!
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Post by spiritmage234 on Jul 9, 2007 16:03:18 GMT -5
Thanks! But I'm kinda mad cuz whenever I think of an idea that I thought of to be original, in reality it's already been made a dozen times. After I thought of the plot, suddenly, the names of the best sci-fi movies of the decade came to mind, including: The Matrix Equilibrium Serenity Æon Flux UltraViolet.... Final Fantasy VII (Even though that ain't a movie. We'll AC was. Grr! You get the picture!)
Need I go on? -_- Now I feel like a plagerist or somethin and I have a fear that I will get flamed when I'm done.
It was originally just inspired by Rurouni Kenshin and Ultraviolet, but then all of those examples of intellectual property popped up. *Sweatdrop*
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Post by neodee on Jul 9, 2007 16:14:48 GMT -5
^I've made several short stories based off of other people's ideas. Sometimes it's fun to make your own version, and be creative with it.
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Post by spiritmage234 on Jul 9, 2007 16:20:25 GMT -5
Yeah, I guess I'm contradicting what I said kinda. Though I admit that I was inspired by those two, I just can't help but feel like I'm copying the other 20 movies/stories that had a plot similar to this one.
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Post by neodee on Jul 9, 2007 16:31:33 GMT -5
Yeah, I guess I'm contradicting what I said kinda. Though I admit that I was inspired by those two, I just can't help but feel like I'm copying the other 20 movies/stories that had a plot similar to this one. I swear I wrote this en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Invisible_%28film%29 movie before it came out. Only difference is my main character was a girl, and she died and wondered around as a ghost.
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Post by spiritmage234 on Jul 9, 2007 19:39:13 GMT -5
Well, here's a sneak peek at a segment of the first chapter of my newest story, Kalare of Night. It's a rough draft, so tell me anything that I can do to make it better. And if you guy's like the idea, I'll give you a profile on the main character. Enjoy. ******************************************************* Kalare approached the thugs with confidence and a stern, but relaxed, expression. She looked like she was simply going to talk them into leaving, like a proper gentleman would. But we all knew that it wasn’t going to be so easy to calmly convince a band of rouge bounty hunters to simply up and leave their bounty. And I think she knew that as well. I figured that Kal was just going to play with her food before she moved in for the kill. “There is no need to disturb the peace in one of the only peaceful places left in the Lithon slums,” she began competently. “Besides, you are all clearly amateurs.” “What?!” said the leader of the band in an angry and flustered voice. “A true and experienced bounty hunter hunts his prey in secret. Then, when the target least suspects it, they ensnare him, making them unable to escape from their grasp.” She paused and chuckled. “When you think about it, bounty hunters and assassins are really not all that different.” Kal’s face then got serious again, but she had a hint of boredom in it. “You guys don’t have what it takes to be assassins, let alone bounty hunters. You should take your band of lowlife thugs and go back to whatever slimy sewer you rats crawled out of, before you get hurt.” “How dare you!” one of the thugs from behind the leader exclaimed as he approached Kal. “Think you can order us around you little surd!” With that, he drew his hand back and struck her across the face. Hard. “Why you! That’s enough you turd!” shouted Ameera. She balled her mechanical fist, ready the charge in and make the situation possibly worse. Or better. “Wait.” I said, holding out my arm in her path. “You are about to see, a true XSol at work.” Ameera looked down at me with confusion. Dante was just as confused. I looked ahead with a grin. “Just watch.” The group looked on ahead at the confrontation. To their disbelief, Kal hadn’t even flinched when the big thug struck her. She just continued looking down on to floor, where the hit positioned her head. The thug who hit her looked satisfied at the fact that he “managed” to hit her. Boy was he wrong. And in trouble. She spoke. “First of all, I wasn’t talking to you,” she said with a calm, disciplinarian voice. Kal then looked up with intense animosity in her cat eyes. “Secondly,” she said while her voice rose with rage and drawing her fist back, “you should learn to treat a lady with more respect!” In less than a second, he flew against a nearby table - breaking it in half - and skidded against the floor before he eventually came to a halt against the far wall at impact with her fist. We heard a clink on the bare-wood floor. I presumed that those were his teeth. “No way,” Dante began astonished. “That dude is at least two feet taller than her, and she didn’t even flinch when he hit her. And she knocked him across the room with nearly no effort at all!” Dante seemed to finally come to see Kalare’s potential as an ex-assassin. As a fighter. As an XSol. “You’re about to see a whole lot more,” I said smiling. Kal looked at the fallen bounty hunter with disgust while his fellow thugs looked on in shock. “uhlan. He ain’t going to be eating normally for awhile.” She turned her head toward the others. They flinched as she turned toward them, afraid that one of them were going to be next. “Too bad that I was forced to do that, but you’re friend should really brush up on his mannerism toward ladies. You can all avoid this if you just leave here now…” The bounty team finally got their macho ness together in order to confront Kal with a challenge again. “There ain’t no way that we’re going to show manners to a lady like you, you wench!” Shouted their leader. He held up his hand and gave the command to charge at her. Kal gave a pleased and sinister grin. “Heh. I guess playtime is over then.” She readied her body for the attack, unzipping her black denim jumpsuit halfway down, revealing an orange tube top. “What’s the matter?” the leader teased. “You’re not going to use your fancy sword to slice us in half?” Kal looked serious when he said this. “My zhaomadao, Little Brother, is sharpened everyday in order to keep him perfect in case I need to slice something (or someone) swiftly and quickly. Little Brother cannot become dull by cutting into the fat of cheap, noisy ingrates - who have the nerve to be called “bounty hunters” - such as yourselves. It‘s just not worth it.” The bounty team had the last straw at Kal’s latest insult. The leader as well as his cronies fumed with rage. “That’s it! Get her boys! Show no mercy!” said the leader as they began to charge at Kal. “I guess I won’t be able to show any mercy either.”
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Post by Chibi Chan-o on Jul 9, 2007 20:27:46 GMT -5
^ Yeah, I like it. Nice and discriptive. And best of all, the women kick Equus asinus!!!
I'm working on a fanfic, but it's not going as well as I had hoped. Maybe I should have given it more thought.....
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Post by Paraiba Ocean on Jul 9, 2007 20:39:41 GMT -5
Well, there's no reason why you can't at least try to make it better. If worse comes to worse, try and end it at the best and most opportune place. Sometimes we write from dry wells. >.>
So...maybe we can help.
1) What is the fanfic based on? 2) Give us summary. 3) Give us an idea of where you want it to go. ^^
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RadiantBeam
Long Feng
Rosa rubicundior, lilio candidior.
Posts: 3,245
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Post by RadiantBeam on Jul 9, 2007 20:57:49 GMT -5
I'm working on a fic, but it's bugging me to death as far as characterization goes... I might cave and post it here, just to see opinions...
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Post by Chibi Chan-o on Jul 9, 2007 21:03:48 GMT -5
Well, there's no reason why you can't at least try to make it better. If worse comes to worse, try and end it at the best and most opportune place. Sometimes we write from dry wells. >.> So...maybe we can help. 1) What is the fanfic based on? 2) Give us summary. 3) Give us an idea of where you want it to go. ^^ Nya, I haven't thought out everything yet. I have a basic idea and stuff to fill it with. I'm having trouble writing it out.... And I'll probably go over it and give it more details. Details are not my strong point.... The fanfic is based on Naruto (because I'm obsessed ). I'm doing a story with a pairing. Actually, it has two pairings in there.... But the main one is SaiXSakura. And in the summary, it'll explain why there are two pairings. Le Summary!!! (sorta) Two and a half years ago, Sakura and Sasuke ended up in the same team. Sakura seized this chance. She did whatever she could to be with him and have him return the love she felt for him.... And she succeeded. She felt as if nothing could ever separate them and their love would last forever. That is, until he left the village, and her, in his quest for power. But she continued to love him with all her heart. Sakura hoped that Sasuke would one day return. Two and a half years later, Sai joined the team. Sai reminded her of Sasuke. However, she hated him, no matter how much he sounded or looked like Sasuke. But then things changed. His personality changed and he became a very good friend to her. After a while, they became much more. Sakura began to love him more than anything. But deep down in her heart, she felt as if this love was wrong.... This love was betraying everything she and Sasuke had..... (That was too long and revealing for a summary.....) I plan on having this story end very sadly. Of course, it's a love story. I'm also going to mess with their ages a bit. They're going to be older than what they are in the actual anime/manga. It's meant to be an emotional torrent.... at least for the characters.
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Post by spiritmage234 on Jul 9, 2007 21:55:46 GMT -5
@chibi: Thanks Chibi! Hopefully, I'll finish the chapter by tomorrow night. ^_^ Nice summary on your Naruto fanfic. Just remember to use detail detail detail. @radiant: Never give up RadiantBeam! Post it here and so we can comment and help you with it. Since I got a positive feedback, here's your profile! I don't have a lot of revealing info, just enough background info and standard info. Character Info on…. KalareApprox. Age during story: 19 Height: 5'4" Aliases: Kal, Concolor, The Chimera Weapon: Zhanmadao -Early Life Kalare “Kal” Sarris was the youngest child of the governor of the Wilar Providence of Dauphin. She had an older brother named Vinfred who was seven years older than she. Their mother died while giving birth to Kalare. Since their father was often absent in their youth, Vinfred became Kalare’s parent figure. From a young age, Vinfred taught Kalare martial artistry, which made their bond become stronger. When the war between Dauphin and Orillia started when she was seven, Vinfred enlisted in the army, and promised Kalare that he would come back as soon as the war was over. Unfortunately, four years into the war, Vinfred apparently died in battle. Traumatized by the death of the only parent she knew, Kalare continued to train in the martial arts, surpassing hand to hand combat as well as weaponry, and soon enlisted in the Dauphin army at the age of fourteen to avenge her brother’s death at the hands of the Orillian army. -The Black Cats After seeing her advanced skills on the battle front at such a young age, the head of the army promoted her to the Black Cats, an elite team of assassins comprised entirely of females, and ranked her as second in command. -After the War After the wars end, the government deceived Kalare into volunteering her body in order to “keep the peace of the country.” However, the imprisoned her in a lab in the Western region of Dauphin and experimented on her and the surviving members of the Black Cats. [The Black Cats were called what they were because they killed their prey like a cat, swiftly and silently. The labs literally made the remaining members into human-animal chimeras, mixed with different species of cats.] Kalare then had to endure painful experimentation for a year until she finally managed to escape with the help of friends on the inside. She realizes over time that she has the senses and the agility of a real cat, and some features like a cat [Though she is a human-animal chimera with the DNA of a feline, Kalare is not considered a “cat girl.” She finds out soon that she is the only “successful” because she was the only experiment who under went the human-chimera experimentations and still retained her human form. So unlike the other “failures”, Kalare doesn't possess many physical feline features (cat ears, paws, tail, etc). All she has are green cat's eyes and retractable "claws", which are actually her nails that were replaced by synthetic keratin that are stronger than normal human nails and are sharper at the ends.]. After escaping, she wandered the wilderness of Dauphin for two years, until she found Keiko Akagawa and XSol in the Eastern Lithon slums. *Author Note: 1)Kalare’s DNA was mixed with that of a puma. 2)Though she does not smoke tobacco, Kalare as on occasion sniff nepeta, also known as catnip. Sniffing catnip does not do any critical harm to her health; however, it can affect her mood, making her from slothful to hyperactive.
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Post by Chibi Chan-o on Jul 9, 2007 22:00:57 GMT -5
Nice studying on the sciency stuff *ish not good with science details*. I don't really read much science-fiction, but yours is turning out to be interesting. (Kal is only 3 inches taller than me )
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