MC's songs/poems

Aww, thanks Paper Heart. XD I feel special now.

This is a... slightly depressing? poem I wrote. No personal experience, I just like writing depressing stuff.

Untouched

Melting down the rain, waiting out the storm
Sighing off the pain but always wanting more
So this is what it's like to drown ankle-deep
To watch the fire die and never start to weep

And as the flames rage on
You're untouched
Ashes burn to ashes
And so you're not devoured
Ashes, still ashes
And you're untouched

So this is what it's like in a river of fire
Always too cold to sate your desire
Fingering the air, feeling something there
Wondering if you're too late to care

And as the waves crash on
You're untouched
Water drowns to water
And so you don't go under
Water, wet ashes
And you're untouched

Can you feel the world, all things bright
Inside your darkness is there any light
Ashes won't burn
Water won't drown
You're untouched.
Do you feel it now?

Oh my gosh! =O MC, those are so beautiful! I love them, MC! =D *Hugs and karmas*

The poem is nice but a little repetitive. You say some of the lines again in different ways or the same way without variety. The four lines in a row starting with the letter A are part of that. Also, the poem is somewhat confusing in what you mean. You are talking about being untouched then say do you feel it now? No one writes perfect poems but these are just some things I noticed.

welcome!!! I just love the song and the poem...^-^

^^Yes, English teachers do tend to contradict themselves a lot. Probably not a good thing, considering I'm majoring in English and I don't like being confused. XD.

Anyways, here's another one. It was originally meant to be a Kataang, but I guess it'd fit just about anyone. It's nothing special, considering I did it in like 10 minutes one day when I was in a particularly Kataangy mood.

Nothing Else Matters

If the world collapsed with you by my side
If all the world drowned with the tide
It would be all right
Because I would have you with me
And that's better than anything
If the sky fell down and we died together
It would be all right 'cause we'd live forever
Because I would have you with me
And that's all that I'd ever need

(chorus)
Nothing else matters
Except having you with me
My world will only shatter
If you leave suddenly
The only thing that counts is you
That's what it all comes down to
Nothing else matters

If black holes took the place of stars
If the earth collided into Mars
It would be all right
Because I'd have you with me
And that's better than anything
I won't mind dying if it's with you
Because my life is basically you
It would be all right
You're all I'll ever need

(chorus)

When nothing seems to be going my way
Just seeing you smile brightens my day
Everything but you is insignificant
I could try to deny it but I'd find I can't
If the sun exploded, if the sky fell in
I wouldn't care, I wouldn't give in
As long as you're here with me
I can face anything

(chorus)

Meh, it sounded better to the music. XP

dreamer--I appreciate your criticism, I really do, I wasn't trying to insult you or anything! LOL what I really meant was that English teachers contradicted each other. Meaning that one says something that another doesn't agree with and vice versa. In literature there's no real *right* or *wrong*, it's all in the eyes of the beholder, but you're soooo much better at poetry than I am, so your advice counts more XD. ^.^

Deleted my other post to bump thread without double posting. XD does anyone even read these anymore? o.O

Deception

You think everything's about you
I'm so sick of your selfish moods
You haven't had a good day
And choose to rain on my parade
You break me down until I cry
And then tell me to toughen up
I'm sick of all the ups and downs
A different mood at every turn-around
You can't just make me your excuse
A scapegoat for everything you do

I need a hand
I'm drowning in these tears I cry
Understand
That I don't know the reasons why
I'm choking, bleeding, holding on
Dying, breathing, living on
But through it all I'm staying strong
Though I'm at your command

I just don't know why
You torture, you deceive and lie
I'm getting so confused
What did I ever do to you?
I'm slowly sinking in
Falling into mystery again
I need to keep from going under
And drowning in these tears I cry

I need a hand to save me from you
And everything you do
I'm choking, bleeding
Dying, breathing
Getting up and living on

I'm not at your command
Don't need you to hold my hand
Deception must have felt so good
To have me on a puppet string
But my dear, revenge is sweeter
And you're about to feel its sting.